One mom's journey through first time motherhood.
A journal to her son, Tucker, inscribing his birth into this world, the lessons and tricks they learned along way, and what they are not telling you in the prenatal books and classes.

Friday, April 24, 2009

day 2 - tucker goes home, sort of

Day two was much the same routine, with an entirely different baby. I would not say we were catching up on our sleep, but we were managing naps throughout the day, when we could.

You must have learned what mom had to offer in those first 24 hours as you no longer would sleep without, well, something to suck on. Swaddling, shooshing, none of that worked and without a pacifier I was your only source. In 2009 "they" recommend no pacifiers or bottles for breastfeeding babies in the first four weeks.

Until we figured out your oral frustration, you cried, a lot. As new parents we felt helpless in our inability to comfort you. The frustration was not our lack of experience, but the disheartening feeling that we were not meeting your needs.

Despite packing our hospital bag with clothes and toiletries for each day, I spent the nearly three days we were in the hospital in my hospital gown and hospital underwear. There was no showering, no hair brushing, definitely no makeup. On the day we left I managed to wash my face and brush my teeth. Was I disgusting? Yes. The way I felt once the ache and dizziness from the delivery set in just didn't allow for those luxuries (besides, the hospital bathroom seemed just plain icky and was splattered with my blood a good part of the time). I relinquished myself to just showering once we arrived home.

The blood is another thing. Seriously? Like there isn't enough I have to deal with right now. Sure, some bleeding from the delivery makes sense, but 6 weeks of it? It's another reason to stay in your hospital gown.

I also never expected to be SO uncomfortable in the days (weeks?) after delivery. It's very difficult to scoot across the bed and standing up straight is completely out of the question. I sat up in the chair for a brief minute or two, but it just did not feel right. Hygiene was postponed until we left the hospital.

Suffice it to say, I (we) was exhausted by the end of our hospital stay. The lack of sleep before the delivery in combination with the lack of sleep post delivery, just wasn't sitting well. Your dad and I were looking forward to getting you home.

It took nearly the entire day to get our discharge papers, but we were ready to go when we did. We dressed you up in your already a bit too tight "go home" outfit and I was wheel chaired out the door. We snapped a few unimpressive pictures and set off from the lovely city of Chicago to take you home... to your grandparent's house.

You slept the entire 45 or so minute trip home, where we arrived just before 9 o'clock. We showered, made dinner, fed you, ate, and embarked on some sleep ...

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