One mom's journey through first time motherhood.
A journal to her son, Tucker, inscribing his birth into this world, the lessons and tricks they learned along way, and what they are not telling you in the prenatal books and classes.

Wednesday, September 30, 2009

I had a heart attack

My heart stopped. My stomach wrenched. I ran. I RAN to Tucker's room.

My worst nightmare, was it coming true?

Well, no, it wasn't. But for a few seconds I thought it might be and in the few seconds it took me to gasp and run to Tucker's room I made Brian feel the exact same way.

So what happened? Again, nothing, nothing happened. Except ...

Tucker has learned to roll over and sleep on his stomach. After three nights of this routine I am easing into accepting it. Belly sleeping seems to have become his preferred modus operandi. I know, I know, "babies used to always sleep on their stomachs", but not these days and not my baby.

Monday morning was the first such incident. I was going about my normal getting ready for work routine which happens to include checking the video monitor to see if my little one is stirring. This Monday morning there was no stir. Tucker was face down in his crib. Here is when I panicked and RAN to him. Still dark this early fall morning I flipped on his bedroom light and dashed to his crib side where he lay still. With my heart no longer beating, I called on my lungs... "TUCKER!"

That is when panic turned to relief and then to... oops. Not quite understanding the fuss, in an instant Tucker was dazed, yet up and in full-arm-extension-upward-dog-position. "I'm up! I'm up!", he seemed to be saying as he anxiously looked around for the fire or oncoming train.

As much as we take pride in all of his milestones (which he seems to be reaching at a feverish rate) they mean both independence and choice, at least in regards to which way he sleeps. We can spend all night flipping him back on his back or we can accept that he found a position that might help him sleep longer through the night.

We already spend all night now watching him on the his monitor to make sure when he does flip over that he does know to turn his head to the side and continues to do so through the night. From the angle of the baby monitor, he undoubtedly looks as though he is face-planted-deathly-still in his crib. In reality he is comfortable slumbering away. A lesson to take away when using a baby monitor or trying to get some sleep...

Monday, September 28, 2009

We are back!

I have managed to let a month slip by without a note about Tucker. How did that happen? It is actually surprising I had been so consistent in my documentary of Tucker's days and nights. So, when September hit us with his four month vaccinations, his first cold (!), a sinus infection for me, work, a family weekend, and a wedding (in which I was the photographer) I let blogging slip, concentrating my spare energy and time on Tucker and filling gaps with sleep and related responsibilities. Here we are a month later all happy, healthy, and ready to pick back up with our "normal" lives.

With a four month birthday on August 22, 2009 and a demandingly healthy appetite, Tucker was reaching the maximum capacity of his clothes, pushing the limits of what "fits". Weighing in at 16 pounds 13 oz and 26 inches long, Tucker had stamped his ticket into the big little boy clothes. Yes, my four month old son (now 5 months!) had graduated into NINE MONTH old sleepers. So, here come the cliche... They grow up so fast.

We like to lay Tucker down at night in onesie sleepers. Carters makes wonderfully cuddly fleece fitted onesies, thanks to Jill and Ben for gifting us with the one Tucker is pictured in here!

As a side, the velour ones are my personal favorites due to their ability to turn Tucker into the ultimate snuggler, but apparently they are not as popular with the onesie makers and much harder to come by. Regardless, the footed onesies are perfect for the non-swaddling sleeper and so they have become Tucker's nightly dressing. I guess when Tucker was no longer able to straighten his legs in the majority of his clothes, we realized he needed some new clothes. When we saw he could no longer assume anything but he fetal position we decided we should buy him some new clothes. When he popped the snaps on his onesie and ended up bottomless with leggings floated up half-shirt style, I decided to go out and buy him some clothes.

As quickly as he was outgrowing his clothes, Tucker seemed to be outgrowing his toys. More appropriately, Tucker seemed to be growing into a whole new set of toys, yearning for new mental challenges and explorations. With Tucker nestled in the baby Bjorn one Friday evening, Tucker and I explored the endless racks of clothes and toys (before he fell asleep) at our local Babies R Us and the adjacent Target. Retail therapy accomplished, Tucker and I hunted down mom's favorite new sleepers (for Tucker) and a set of new toys all of which are his favorite. The same weekend Tucker's grandparents were out on a similar venture, finding him this crazy contraption for entertainment away from his house.

We can already see his head growing from the extra synapses firing...